This year, I decided to take up space.
At the start of each year, like most people, I take time to reflect and set goals.
Ive beensharing my lifewith the Internet for the better part of a decade.
As a creator, I battle with myself over who I want to beto the Internet.
Im one of those believers that everything trulydoeshappen for a reason though.
My little one-handed resilient soul never let it stop me.
April Lockhart / Design by Tiana Crispino
Im sure the heart behind them was well-intended.
It felt heavy and sweaty…and just not me.
As a kid, my parents thought Id prefer to appear normal and would continually get me updated prosthetics.
April Lockhart / Design by Tiana Crispino
Clearly, I was bound to be the center of attention since day one.
April Lockhart / Design by Tiana Crispino
What I never wanted to be was a one-handed influencer.
I never wanted my disability tobeme.
Over the years, Ive had periods where Im more or less comfortable with it.
On the Internet, its a lot easier to curate who we are.
But wait…thats not the point, right?
We want to actually have influence?
Still, I felt like there was space missing within fashion and beauty.
This year, with my notebook in a loud Nashville coffee shop, I decided to take up space.
I landed on posting 30 days of outfits onTikTokand Instagram Reels.
Once I started, as I thought about the content Id been creating, it just felt…dull.
It feels silly to say, but it was a big internal leap.
Thats when I decided to film a reel getting dressed, with my quirks and allno more hiding.
The two can coexist without it being weird.
In fact, it can feel light and joyful and fun.
I typed Normalizing Disabled Fashun Girlies in your Feed on a whim, and hit post.
I was so nervous to even look at it that I pretty much went to sleep.
I woke up to a lot of emotions.
The messages that Ive gotten over the last few weeks are what its all about for me.
A sweet mom on TikTok whose 3-month-old daughter also has one hand wrote me, Brb crying.
I cant wait to show my daughter that shes not alone, and it was over for my mascara.
Beyond normalizing my disability, I want to emphasize that clothes have power.
Putting on a good outfit can give you the confidence you need for the day.
Taking the time to do your makeup can be a moment of rest.
Curling your hair gives you time to think without being glued to your phone.
And a good pair of jeans can make you feel like a 10 on a first date.
Through this experiment, Ive learned the power of the good on the Internet.
Also, the TikTok community is…really nice?
The Future
So, whats next?
Hopefully this is one step in the right direction, toward brands prioritizing representation and a community feeling represented.
Little by little, new standards blossom in beautiful ways.
One thing Ive learned is that confidence is a journey.
You dont arrive, and you likely wont always be fully there, and thats completely okay.
At 26, I still havent grown out of my insecurity.
Theres a lot of beauty in purpose.
